


Vol.1 How to maintain a healthy relationship with your guitarist?

by The_Cat_In_The_Hat



Series: A Guidebook on Managing Your Band [1]
Category: Coldplay (Band)
Genre: Bottom!Chris, M/M, Top!Jonny
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:53:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23835700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Cat_In_The_Hat/pseuds/The_Cat_In_The_Hat
Summary: This is for 소, happy late birthday 🍰
Relationships: Jonny Buckland/Chris Martin
Series: A Guidebook on Managing Your Band [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1717450
Comments: 1
Kudos: 7





	Vol.1 How to maintain a healthy relationship with your guitarist?

**Author's Note:**

> This is for 소, happy late birthday 🍰

Under what circumstances is it proper and decent to share a bed with your roommate?

First, you are afraid of lightnings and there are thunders and lightnings out of the window literally at this moment.

Second, you are British.

Third, you are not afraid of lightnings but you are hopelessly obsessed with your roommate. Every night you fall asleep in your bedroom on the other side of wall with a head full of fantasies of him, sometimes you press your palm on the wall and rub it with tender and strength, imaging that is the back of your roommate and it is his hand that is under the quilt that is jerking you off. You come with a bite of his name in your mouth under your tongue, you cannot control yourself but prolong the last syllable of his name as if that is something precious and you would not take that out of your mouth. The wall is thin and your heart beats so hard like a flock of elephants dancing in your bed. You are afraid that he might hear you and you want him to hear you at the same time, you wish the wall just falls down but you fear to face your bare and pure desire and lust for him because losing control means losing everything for you. 

At nightfall the second day, you rehearsal with him in his bedroom. Just the two of you, you and him. To prevent yourself having too many unrealistic fantasies, you refuse to sit in bed with him to play guitar, you insist to stand in front of his desk near and window and keep your back towards him. The room is narrow and he is right behind you, you could even feel his breath on your neck, where he gives you goosebumps and your skin hairs stand up out of self-defense. He starts to play the songs you wrote last week, you close your eyes to listen to how his fingers move on the strings and how music flows under his finger, then you remember how you imagine his hands moving on your body and skin last night. It is time for you to start singing but you did not open your mouth because your dick is so hard that you can barely concentrate. You know your beloved guitarist is now staring the back of your head with confusion in his addictive green eyes, but what you are thinking is that fortunately he is behind you. You tell him briefly that you need to use the bathroom and then rush out of his bedroom and lock yourself in the bathroom. You lean against the door, listing to the fucking sexy distant sound of guitar playing and jerking off, come again for your guitarist very soon. The feelings of being pathetic and miserable suddenly attack you while you clean up the mess you just made, and you drown more easily in such emotions than your obsession with him. You come twice in less than 24 hours because of the same person, what a unsatisfied pervert. You wash your hands and then your face for a refresh, you stare in the mirror in your own eyes, which are now watery because of aftertaste of lust, and you speak to yourself with disgust in your tone: Chris, you better be fucking sober and don’t fuck up this again. You find yourself wandering at the edge of losing control, every time you are with him there are thousands of hands coming out of your throat, trying to pull him inside your body. You are so intense that you want to spit out all your feelings about him and you want to vomit, but you also wish you could swallow him in to let him see your feelings himself. This is unhealthy Chris, this is very sick to be honest. Looks like you will have to solve this problem right now, although you understand that if you could not get rid of your addiction you will have to live with it, you understand this more than anyone else.  
If more than half of the above circumstances fit you, then you might want to start considering about how to make it possible for you to share bed with your roommate. This is the most healthy and reasonable choice for you to solve this problem. No matter what the result is, it is healthy to solve this unhealthy problem once and for all.

First you need to knock on your roommate’s door. Although you have plotted this for a long time, still you have to act like you hesitate and you are so afraid of bothering him but you have to. Innocence and helplessness must be full of your face. In order to trick your roommate to let you share a bed with him, you have to tell him that you are afraid of lightnings and thunders from a very young age and you had bad memories of raining night. (Given that it is raining heavily right now and there are vicious lightnings and thunders, it is a wise choice to use this as an excuse.) There used to be a fluffy Teddy bear with you as a soothing toy but you lost him recently because you just moved house. And you might want to be extra careful to add that your roommate looks exactly the same as your Teddy, fluffy and all that, and the feeling of hugging him might also be as warm and soft as hugging your Teddy. Then you need to ask him the most critical question: is it possible for you to share a bed with him for just one night?

Under normal circumstances, you better not add that comment of your roommate’s appearance, saying that he looks like your Teddy bear, because it is too explicit to say it out frankly like this. This is indeed sexual harassment and you are so lucky that your roommate did not punch on your face. Unless, remember there is always an important “unless”. Unless your roommate is a good sir who will laugh at every one of your terrible and shitty jokes and who barely turns you down.

Of course your roommate will be hesitating, but you will never know why. Deep down somewhere inside your heart buried your speculation of why he hesitated which you would never tell anyone, but you do hope that it is true. He hesitates but still says yes, you could share a bed with him for one night but you have to bring your own pillow and blanket. You are so excited that you want to jump on the roof and sing for all night long, but still you press down your excitement and slowly walk into your bedroom and lock the door, then you shout and dance like a maniac silently and grab the lamp and start your silent performance of We Are The Champions. After you finish your crazy performance you change into newly washed pajama, then you sniff yourself and become satisfied with the fresh smell of detergent. Then you put on your innocent and helpless mask again, under which is the crafty smile that you don’t even bother to hide, and knock on your roommate’s door for a second time.

At this moment you lie together in your roommate’s bed, on your own pillows and under your own quilts. You suddenly forget what you normally do to pass the chatting time before you go to sleep. Talking about music maybe? Or girls? Or the curriculum of your majors? Or The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy? Or if we could change into one piece of furniture what would we be? Or the bassist in your band who has enormous sexual appeals to same gender? Or when would you find a drummer for your band? So many options flash in your head, yet you choose the most ridiculous one as your opening remark: good weather today, huh?

Your roommate laughs, perhaps this is your weird sense of humor from his perspectives and you know clearly that he likes this about you and you laugh with him. This is so surreal—laughing and shivering in the same bed with the person you are so obsessed with. This is dream coming true and the weather is good today indeed.

You can see your roommate has no intention to find a subject to chat with you, he yawns several times and you tell him considerately that he could turn off the light right now because you are sleepy as well. But in fact you are planning in your head on how to spend this long long night and you are not sleepy at all.

Light seems to spare no place for secrets to hide, but only when darkness swallows you do you realize that darkness is the diffuser of lust. You pretend that you could hide all your thoughts and desires, but they submerge you fiercely and effortlessly.

It’s so close.

You breath in the air his just breathed out, does this mean that part of him stays inside your body forever, part of you melted together and you are inseparable thereafter? He breathes in the air you just breathed out, does this mean part of you can finally get inside his mind and heart to see what is him make of and to understand why you are so obsessed with him? Maybe you could cross the line drawn by your quilts between you and him, sneak into his quilt and find his hand. You could draw meaningless circles with your finger on his palm or just hold his fingers and do nothing. Or you might turn around and face him, observing his stubbles grow in the darkness. He has high metabolism and you notice the golden-brown stubbles on his jaw and above his lips every morning when he comes out of his bedroom, stretching himself and yawning, even though he shaves everyday. Oh perhaps he will grow sexy and attractive mustache when he is almost 30 years old, 19-year-old you think this way.

It’s too close indeed.

He smells perfect, the special scent of himself mixed with the flowery scent of detergent, forest-like scent of shampoo and body lotion becomes the scent of heaven. Darkness makes your sense so superior that you could distinguish every scent of him. You sniff yourself secretly under your quilt and be satisfied that you smell pretty much like him because you use his shampoo and body lotion tonight. You want to smell like him but there’s his special scent you could not imitate. You want to inhale more of him so you turn you head towards him and take a deep breath. It is the smell of cedar bathing in the sunlight in a snowy day, or the smell of newly cut firewood in front of the fireplace on Christmas Eve. These scents, which should make people have warm and idle association ideas, somehow make you excited and feel sexually aroused. The scents of him is so pale and light that you are not sure if those are just your fantasies. It is more suitable to say that is an ambience than a scent, you submerge yourself into him.

Could you be closer?

When you come on the other side of the wall, calling his name with your tongue, is it possible that he is holding his own dick at the same time and thinking about you? No, not a chance at all. You are less than a flashing thought for him, otherwise why is he breathing so peacefully right now? But is it true? Are you sure that he never fantasizes you when he is touching himself? Then why is there fire and desire inside his eyes when sometimes you look back at him in his bedroom when you rehearsal together? It appears that he wants something from you as well. But the sparkles are faster than shooting stars and they are much more difficult for you to catch. Maybe he just has passion for your music and that’s all, then he will masturbate and pant furiously while listening to your singing in the midnight. Or maybe he is obsessed with you as well, just like you are obsessed with him. Maybe he is not sleeping at this moment and thinking of you just like what you are doing to him. Admit it, you have fantasy and you wish something happen tonight, you wish he could do something to you, or you could do something to yourself.

You wait. Heavy rain outside the window drains into your ear. An insect is wrapped by turpentine and falls into the river under the pine tree. The new moon swings on the surface of calm ocean and a giant whale just turns around deep down. Time stops and the whole world rests still. All these peaceful scenes inside you are imagining will not change the fact that your dick is harder than a rock right now because you let yourself lie down next to your roommate and you let your sexual fantasies of him fill up your head.

Chris Martin, you are such a filthy boy.

You sigh hopelessly and turn your back against your roommate. Your hand next to your pants is strangled by guilty and shame. Is God watching? If God truly is almighty, then why would he allow an evil creature like your roommate to exist, who could destroy all your sense and self-control? Could your roommate actually be Siren, who would lure people with beautiful singing? No, he couldn’t be. But the only difference between him and Siren is that Siren could only use her sound to lure sailors, but everything about your roommate is a trap and this trap is dug for you and you only. Is God watching? If so then God better watch fucking carefully.

You lick your lips with your tongue, and your right hand slips into your pants. You touch your penis gently outside the underpants, imaging that’s your roommate’s hand and he is teasing you. He knows that you want him so bad and he decides to not let you get what you want. You use your right hand because it is not your dominant hand and you heard long time ago that not using your dominant hand would give you a feeling that someone else is doing a hand job for you and you want authentic feelings. But not long after your hand slides inside your underpants, because in your fantasy your roommate is impatient and he has already striped you and touched you from head to toe. Now he presses you against the wall and covered your mouth with his hand and middle finger in your mouth, playing with your tongue. Meanwhile he holds your dick with another hand and jerks you off quickly and in your imagination, you said to yourself this is what you call an excellent guitarist proudly. In order to satisfy your fantasy, you are busy with your dick right now but you have to pay attention to reality as well and try your best to be quiet, because you have no intention to wake up your roommate. If he wakes up now he will definitely tell you to piss off and move out tomorrow, he will never tell anyone what happened but he will avoid you like avoiding Plague. What? This makes you feel more excited? You are absolutely hopeless.

You are so concentrated on satisfying yourself that you miss the laughter that sounds like a sigh behind you.


End file.
